After almost eight months of reading any information on sleep I could get my hands on...here is my two bits on the subject.
I promised myself I would return the favor, after reading countless blogs on the subject, searching...for any information that could help.
Follower of Weissbluth "Healthy sleep habits, Happy Child"
-never had a problem feeding my daughter, only problem was trying to keep her full
-slept through the night since 3 months (12 straight hours), but was a horrible day time sleeper from 0-4 months, 4-6 months a better daytime sleeper but required extensive soothing (this part made me crazy) 6-8 months a good daytime sleeper that requires little soothing just her bottle
-believer in the strong impact on sleep/predictable schedule and your babies mood
-she begun to sprout teeth at 4 months old...currently she has 6 teeth...has been teething for most of this process
Current nap schedule:
Wake-up time 6:30-7:00 a.m.- quite often we hear her at 6:30, but after 5 minutes of grumbling she goes back to sleep until I wake her at 7:00 a.m.
7:00-7:30 - change her/breakfast: 3-4 tbsp of cereal, 1-2 tbsp of fruit
7:30-8:30 - play
8:30-8:45 - go for a walk (rain or shine)
8:45-9:00 - bottle (8 ounces) in her quiet/semi-dark room and then bed (if it is closer to 9:00 less talking/whining; if it is closer to 9:30 more crying), she goes to bed WIDE AWAKE!
10:30-10:45- when I hear her wake-up I shower and then go in and get her up/change her
10:45-11:00- I get ready and she plays in the Exersaucer
11:00-11:45- play/or run quick errands
11:45-12:15 - lunch: currently a different kind of cereal and 1-2 tbsp of vegetables
12:15-12:30 - she plays while I clean up
12:30-12:45 - go for a walk
12:45-1:00 - bottle (8ounces/bed), she goes to bed WIDE AWAKE, but talks more then her morning nap
2:30-3:00 - wake-up (she sleeps longer then an 1-1.5 hours 5-6 days a week)
3:00-3:30 - play/bottle (4 ounces)
3:30-5:00 - errands
5:00 - 6:00 - supper :1tbsp of meat/1-2 tbsp of a vegetable/3 tbsp of mixed cereal/bath/books/bottle (8 ounces) /bed (goes to bed wide awake)
-if she goes to bed around the 6:00 mark we rarely hear much from her, if it gets later she grumbles for a bit longer
-we don't go into her room at night and have not since she was 3 months old
*I stopped rocking her after 6.5 months...should have started this earlier...I went through one week of crying and then it lessened.
*I am diligent to have her sleep in her crib, and ensure she takes both naps on time; give or take 10-15 minutes.
I hope this helps those who want their baby to be on a schedule and have no idea what that looks like.
I would be happy to answer any questions on what my schedules looked like prior to this age, because I remember it ALL as clear as day, and to give you the "I wish I would have sooner...tips as well."
I am a total type-A personality when it comes to my daughter, so I understand those who think this seems a bit rigid. I am able to work out in the morning while may daughter has a nap/do laundry and get organized for the day. The predictability in my day has truly brought back my sanity!
Next to tackle: the thickness of her foods, and introducing finger foods.
Simply my two bits on babies and sleep.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Would you say she is aging well?
When is this type of look no longer appropriate? 30's 40's 50's?....I mean if you are lucky enough to have blonde hair naturally good on you, but when does this long, bright blonde hair style look inappropriate? I worry that I may have answered my own question and that the days of my BLONDE DO are numbered.
So as mentioned before in a recent post I have around 2 inches of roots. I am really not sure what my natural hair color is but imagine it something horrific and dull. I can vaguely remember using words like muddy, and unfortunate to describe it. So for the last 14 years I have colored it mostly blonde. There has been on occasion where I changed it dramatically:
-there was one time when it went BLACK with PURPLE hues in it and my Nan wouldn't let me in the house because she didn't know who I was
-there was the time when I went swimming right before my grade 12 grad and it was so fried it actually turned GREEN on the ends
-there was also many times I decided to become a BRUNETTE, only to be frightened by my ghostly complexion and the responses of others...it goes something like this
A LOOK, A PAUSE, and A STATEMENT: "looks nice." People are nice but they lie.
Yet even with those "sarcastic statements" being said behind my back and the fact that winter is coming and will make me look dull and drone THE LYRICS TO Baz Luhrmann's song keeps haunting me:
"don't mess too much with your hair or by the time your 40 it will look 85"
I'm in trouble.
I feel like if there is a time to grow it out THIS might be my only real chance...the fact that it is somehow cool and trendy to have the "two-toned" hair look right now...it is as if the universe is tempting me to go for it.
THE OFFICIAL QUEST to uncover MY natural hair color begins ...
For all of you who have made the long voyage back or never strayed too far from the hair color you were genetically meant to have, I salute you!
Monday, September 20, 2010
Lets not lie we all do this.
The other day at my yoga class a lady came up and told me that in order to close the doors to the studio I had to hold both knobs...to which I thought "lady I've been coming here for 8 years, I think I know that...and you have been coming here for what? one session."
I took a completely kind situation and turned it into something pretty horrible.
This is not a good attribute...I'm working on it.
When I first got pregnant, I remember feeling the stares and obvious judgement more intensely.
"I can't believe she is wearing that when she is pregnant."
"I can't believe she is still exercising...she is exercising too much."
"I can't believe she is eating that for lunch."
"She is gaining too much weight, she is gaining not enough weight."
"I thought she didn't want to have kids."
Yikes I thought...but I should have known this was only the preamble for becoming a mother.
"Your not taking her out enough."
'Your not breastfeeding."
"She is sleeping too much, or not enough."
"Your too strict with her schedule."
"Your just anxious and that is making the baby anxious."
"Your reading too many books."
"Stop looking on the Internet."
"I don't think she is enjoying motherhood...or perhaps some people might have experienced: "she is just all about the baby, she is smothering that poor thing."
NOTE: Women (all human beings) but mostly WOMEN need to get on the same team.
This team (women) carries a bowling ball around for 9 months, work, possibly have other children at home, make dinner (not me, but some people do this), are expected to look great while doing it and after it, need to smile so that the world knows this whole experience is amazing every moment of every day and combat every last crazy hormonal influx during the course of it...all while we judge each other.
I'm not sure when this started but it needs to stop.
I can only imagine what some people are even thinking while they are reading my blog: family is thinking (Oh dear, she isn't happy), friends could be thinking (Geez she has no idea about punctuation or spelling), random people could be thinking (I hear you).
The funny thing is, if I was writing about how to make Organic baby food, and clean hardwood floors with all natural ingredients you would be judging me as well.
I have a vision in my head of a mom who lets her child wear his Superman pajamas out to the grocery store with his favorite rubber boots...I can't imagine what some people would be saying as she walked by...and the thing IS she'd probably be ready for someone to say something to her just so she could defend herself. A LOT OF TIME spent by both parties on something that doesn't even matter.
So as I shut down my lap top for the day, as my little girl is sleeping upstairs WITH only 1 minute of light crying (APPLAUSE APPLAUSE), I will go out and try to treat everyone with a little more kindness and compassion.
Thanks for reading my rambles.
The rubber boots that I have been eyeing are at Superstore: they are Hunter Green and have lace ups up the front: $34.00 (ish). I included a pic of one pair that they have at Superstore as well.
The other clothing items are from Madewell (sister store of J.Crew).
Sunday, September 19, 2010
So...what to wear on maternity leave...and does it matter?
The answer is "yes."
Think of the following scenarios:
1) You have had enough, things are getting overwhelming and basically "you quit." You trudge along just trying to get to that 5:00 time frame...when your husband finally gets home and there is crying CRYING and MORE CRYING...you want to pull the whole "you deal with this I'm out of here scenario" BUT...you realize you are still wearing your pajama pants...NO GOOD.
2) You get ready to go to somewhere exciting like Superstore or Walmart, but your feeling particularly sassy so you decide to put on something crazy like a sweater (cashmere)...AS YOU LEAVE...your offspring decides to unload their entire stomach contents on your sweater...A SWEATER that will stay with puke on it for quite sometime because getting to the dry cleaners is not a top priority...NO GOOD.
3) You head out to Chapters and decide to get a coffee and walk around...AHH MATERNITY LEAVE YOUR THINKIN'. Your baby is wearing something cleverly put together and things are looking good, BUT because you've decided to follow a certain SLEEP book your time frame is very limited...and you've just spent way too much time dressing your baby...SO YOU just grab a coat and head out with little attention paid to YOU. As you arrive at Chapters you see a mom with a baby that is around your babies age...AND her hair is done...AND her pants are not crusted with oatmeal...AND HER baby is wearing one of those whimsical head bands with a flower on it...AND her baby is soooo HAPPY...NO GOOD.
4) You get home from going shopping and you go upstairs to give your baby a bottle and thus hopefully set the scene for them going to bed. Your baby rests their head on your chest and begins to eat, but eyes the clever lululemon tag dangling from your zipper....because your child is "crazy" they begin to obsess about it, touch it and try to EAT IT. The moment of hunger has seemed to subside because now your child is having a love affair with the pull "thing" on your coat...nap time seems to be getting more and more distant....NO GOOD.
5)You wear your pants that are of the "slim fit" kind and go out again TO somewhere exciting like "Save on Foods." You are again feeling pretty happy with yourself for having put on said jeans, a scarf, and that you even took the time to get out your sunglasses...you feel like you have just captured celebrity mom status. Due to your celebrity status and the potential paparazzi around, you decide to go into "supermom" mode when you get home and get on the floor to play with your baby. You soon realize that the slim fitting jeans are very limited in terms of mobility and coverage...NO GOOD.
In all honesty if your like me and do love clothing, maternity leave is tricky.
-You don't want to give up something ELSE you truely adore so you try to keep up to current trends.
-You are on a limited income, your clothes need to be machine washable, stretchy, dual purpose
What I think works:
1. Zippered leggings:makes it look like your still "in it"
2. Great "celebrity status" scarf...keep it in your car or baby bag: something that is soft and you adore...great for covering up barf and drool on your clothing: look on boutiquetoyou.com "love quotes" scarf...pricey but 10% of the proceeds go to the a children's charity and they have cool names like "meditation"
3. T-shirt dress or tunic: basic colors, look on Revolve clothing at these brands BOBI and BB Dakota...usually reasonably priced and often you can find a coupon code to bring it down further.
4. Boots: that have a wide enough shaft (UGGs) that you can hold a baby and stuff your feet into at the same time OR knee high boots and you just figure out how to make it work
5. Watch: necessary if you are schedule Nazi like me, buy one that is colorful just to show the world your not taking things too seriously. Look on revolveclothing.com for a watch like Nixon's blue time teller, or go to Roots for a bright colored watch for $50ish dollars.
6. Jewelery: something that is soft and not too flashy so that it becomes amusement for your child in "quiet-time" activities. Ex: Dogeared karma bracelet
7. Belt: look for one that you can slide over your t-shirt dress or tunic. Look on Anthropologie's website for their tellicherry belt.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
So here I am 7 months later...a baby, 2 inches of roots, and huge bags under my eyes.
AH, the good ole quest for happiness. Does it exist? It seems that in my semi-delusional state of existence due to the lack of sleep I have been currently getting ...
(not because my baby doesn't sleep, but because of the thought that she could not sleep keeps me up all hours of the night)...
I know this doesn't make sense, trust me, I've googled it.
I keep wondering does this Dalai Lama type happiness exist, and is it really (really) hard to obtain, because I'm not going to lie hard work makes me quit...
So I embark on this journey to hear what "His Holiness" has to say about that topic." I mean I get a hole in my new Gypsy05 sweat pants and I cry, this guy lost his country and still seems pretty darn happy, maybe there is something to it AND well truth be told I could use a truck full of happiness these days.
So why the Dalai Lama? WELL... mostly because after 7 months of rocking, patting, restraining my little girl I feel it may be time for her to learn the skill of going to sleep on her own...aka known as CIO method (cry it out method) for those of us who don't read other people's blogs to either hear their painful "GO" of parenting or SOME ADVICE depending on the day. This will come full circle, bare with me...so I download an audio book thinking that perhaps it could keep my mind off of the war going on in the crib upstairs, and help me refrain from LOSING MY FRIGIN MIND...SO with my Marc Weissbluth book in hand, to reassure myself I am "simply loving my baby enough to teach her the skill of sleeping" and my Ipod freshly downloaded with my audio book I retreat to my lair (an air mattress that I sleep on from time to time) that is in the basement. Yes this is my life, don't judge me.
The goal of all human beings is to be happy.
I think to myself...perhaps I need to reset my goals a bit CUZ...currently I'm listening to a baby that I have rocked upwards of 20-30 minutes to sleep just to put her down in the crib and have her eyes to pop open like the exorcist. I have stayed in my JAIL for the last 7 months to "preserve" her sleep schedule like Mr. Weissbluth directed only to have her be unable to fall asleep at all on some days. If the goal of my existence is to be happy, then let me get off my air mattress and take a bath without the fear that the water running will wake up the baby (that is probably not sleeping anyways.)
GOAL NOT ACHIEVED.
The audio book "The Art of Happiness" continues: "We also often add to our pain and suffering by being overly sensitive, overreacting to minor things, and sometimes taking things too personally. We tend to take small things too seriously and blow them up out of proportion, while at the same time we often remain indifferent to the really important things, those things which have profound effects on our lives and long-term consequences and implications."
HITTING CLOSER TO HOME: the impermanence of life VS baby not napping well...minor versus major life events. Okay so perhaps my situation is hardly dire, but it is hard. This whole parenting thing is hard...damn it...not death-like hard, but pretty darn hard.
This reality check , however COULD help keep ones clarity and semi-sanity throughout this whole parent thing...life is impermanent (deep I know), and life is a struggle. The Dalai Lama states the first day we are born we are faced with struggles, and will continue to experience them throughout our life...yet we do not scream out "Happy Strugglemas, we say Happy Birthday." If we celebrate and/or accept that life is hard and that struggles will come up it may be in our realm of possibility that we can say "well, YEP there it is another experience, another opportunity to train my mind to deal with this situation with compassion, patience and kindness." I guess easier said then done, but if I really could try and master this then maybe I could have accepted the following phrase: "that's just baby" or "yep that's parenthood for you" and instead of wanting to put people's heads through the wall I may have said YEP parenthood has its struggles, it is to be expected and move on without all they other stuff: GUILT, ANGER AND RESENTMENT.
So as I quest for happiness with my audio book in hand and TEACH my little girl how to sleep (a minor, yet so major, blip on the radar screen of my life)...I think I know one way to cultivate happiness...
So here it is what I want right now...not that desiring and acquiring objects will give me long lasting happiness, but it will take my mind of this noise WAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH.
-the two dresses are from Revolveclothing.com: one is LAMB (expensive), BOBI (not expensive)--the fur vest is on Revolve aswell
-the other puffer vest is from J.Crew., there is an even better one at Lululemon if you can get your hands on it (it has a hood too)
...just sayin'. Nothing better then a pair of leggings, a fur vest to jazz it up, and puffer vest to jazz it down...all while questing for Happiness.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Have you ever met one of those people that inspire you? I'm not talking the Mother Teresa type; just one of those people that busily go about their life making everything fun. I have had the opportunity to meet said person, and I have to say it makes all the difference. This said meeting makes me believe that one should only leave room for these type of people, a.k.a the "finest" people or friends in your life.
Leaving room for only the finest means that you too will have some work to do...these
people are hard to find. They can take a typical day and make it magical with only the fewest means. These people are the friends whose very nature make you feel accepted, validated and admired. They hear you talk and listen...recalling days later what was said. To make a long story short these are very powerful people to have in your corner. Find them and keep them as friends at all costs.
Leaving room for the finest in terms of clothes follows the very same logic. Only leave room in your closet for those things that you really adore...sale items aren't any good when you don't spring out of bed to put them on. If this means you have less clothes then that is just how it is. You need only to make room for those quality, adored and cherished items in your closet. I often think of big designers like "Chanel," now certainly I do not have the money to buy these items, but if I did how great it would be. They are timeless, and the more they make it to the classification of "vintage" the more adored and revered they are. These items would never be moved to a downstairs box they would always hold a place in your closet. Now, for us common folk I think the same holds true with the pieces we really adore. These pieces in my opinion can come from Old Navy, or JCrew, or even H&M BUT...they need to be adored. You need to go to the shop and look at that piece of jewelry, or shirt and say there it is! I never quite understood people buying a piece of clothing that is "good enough" or "will work"...in my opinion hold out or do without, until you find the one item you want to wear on the way home.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Over the last few days I have gotten back in the habit of taking 15 minutes to meditate in the morning. This is a far cry from the hour daily I put in last year, but none-the-less, I'm back at it. The need to meditate stems closely with the ever increasing belly I have been showcasing and the inability to quiet the monkey in my mind. The 15 minutes in the morning has reminded me about my belief in the Universe and its energy.
How do I know that the Universe can sometimes provide you with what you really need? Of course there are the simplest happenings such as throwing out "I wish we had cake" and such a cake is provided" but I think there is more going on and at various levels. I will spare you all the "universe" type theories or details that roll around in my head...basically I have forgotten about my strong belief in "Energy out equals energy in." If you don't put yourself out there to make things happen, the Universe really has no chance in placing you in the predicament where you can learn, grow or flourish. I throw in the "learn" part as part of my career was just that a "learning" opportunity...one that taught me that there is more to life then just work, and that only having one spoke in your wheel of life can have tragic consequences. I also believe that within that "learning" period, which can easily be coined as the "crappy time in your life," it is up to you to make the change; to get the Universal energy rolling so to speak. You have to do something...
I figure that I am currently in the "growing" phase...
here is where I derail from the authentic, Oprah type conversation to the more materialistic beware...
and I will continue to "grow" my wardrobe for as long as the Universe deems fitting. Hence my wishlist in pictures.
Do you remember what it felt like before you went back to school after a long summer holiday? You got all your supplies ready...and mentally took note of what you would change about yourself and your actions for the school year. Or do you recall how you felt after you were sick with a cold or the flu? You started cleaning your house top to bottom, ate better and washed your hands just a bit more than you did before. I feel like I am in one of those situations; one where I need to start labelling my pencil crayons, take inventory of what I have and need, and to start making a plan.
Unfortunately I have had more luck planning my wardrobe then my actual "life." I can't say that my plan will work...I can already hear the moans and groans of millions "you just wait, you'll be so tired" or "you just wait...it won't be possible." BLAH!!! So just to make sure these people know that I don't really have my head up the clouds (all the time that is), I will preface the following list with: Daily challenges, to be met with some degree of flexibility.
I will wake up and get ready for the day regardless of whether or not I actually leave the house, baby crying or not.
I will continue to exercise as soon as possible: 4 days treadmill and weights, 1 day yoga and 1 day in the pool. I will sign up for the "Women's day race" and dominate.
I will do my darndest to train my new little girl to enjoy the jogging stroller, or I will learn to listen to my IPod slightly louder than normal.
My husband will take care of the baby one morning a week before he goes to work so that I can go to the pool.
I will go for a walk each morning to get a coffee...regardless.
I will get out in the afternoon even if it means going to Walmart...and no I don't have a Walmart outfit (not yet anyways).
I will evolve in ways that are independent of "motherhood" during the course of my leave.
I will be a "joiner" mommy and me yoga, baby massage, strollercise, and swimming.
I will not listen to or become one of those judgemental mothers.
So now that the room is ready, and the time is drawing nearer...I need to hold onto some blind faith that I will not loose myself, and I will do everything in my power to enjoy it and not wish one second away...okay maybe a few seconds.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
I was driving home today and I forgot that I was pregnant. I think perhaps the baby has moved down a bit allowing me to breathe a bit easier and eat more than a granola bar at one sitting...I feel I got a little normalcy back. Within this normalcy however, my mind has shifted from pushing out a baby, being a mother, and sleepless nights to the next most logical thought..."What will I wear on maternity leave?"
I'd like to think that I will be running errands like Jessica Alba and coffeeing with friends with a quiet, content baby (I'm not really interested in the reality of it all). So within my daydreams I have concocted a few necessary items that I will need to purchase to ensure that I have the right outfit for the right occassion.
Here is goes:
First outing with friends after having the baby: leggings, new black modal dress,BB Dakota Leather Jacket, Tolani scarf, cocktail ring, Louis Vuitton large tote and Frye boots
Baby Shower: BB dakota Leather Jacket,JCrew floral tunic, black zippered leggings, and Louis Vuitton large tote
Going to Mommy and Me Yoga class(fast forward 4 weeks): Lululemon pink jacket and new still pants (I have had mine for the last 3 years and I think it may be time to replace), and Uggs
Strollercise class at Servus Center: Lululemon pink jacket (see two places I can wear it...must mean I need it) and still pants with regular ole running shoes.
Shopping Trip: J Brand skinny jeans, Frye Boots(2nd time for these guys), White Drop-waisted tunic from Old Navy, new Om necklace from Boutiquetoyou, Louis Vuitton (a.k.a baby bag), and J.Crew white and pink scarf
Doctor's Appointments: J.Crew stretch twill mini black pants, , White Drop-waisted tunic from Old Navy, Matt Bernson flats, and maybe the cocktail ring if I'm feeling sassy
Staying at home: Juicy Couture terry pants, long beach grey cardigan from J.Crew
To come...summer fashion: which will have to include going to the playground, going for swim lessons, and adventures at the cabin
Perhaps I should really get back to the adventure at hand...I mean I am pregnant and I am having a baby...